Life so far

Been missing from blogging for so so long.. haha.. Well, i've been pretty busy with school work and tuitions. I really regret taking 4 core modules this sem. The workload is really too much. One after another the workload keeps on rising esp the essays and presentations that we have to come up with. It totally sucks! Sometimes i feel as though i have lost touch with myself in the midst of everything. I feel lost without any direction in life. Do i even know what is it that i want? I guess i'm a bit confused.. Hopefully choosing Psychology was the right choice. I have come to realise that everytime i blog, i always have grievences about my life.. Haiz.. I think i should get a life and not grumble so much.

Well, life have not been all that gloomy though. We just celebrated our festival called "Dashain". Well, what we do is that we go around visting relatives houses whereby they put 'tika' (rice with red colouring added) on our forehead and shower us with blessings and of course money. Hmm, being born and raised in Singapore, not really sure as to what is the symbolic meaning of 'tika', never really got around asking mummy about it. Maybe one day i shall.. It is the most enjoyable festival of my culture. At least to me it is. It is such a joy meeting all our relatives, enjoying ourselves playing card games which basically is gambling and of course my personal fav, eating Nepalese delicacies. This year was the first time i celebrated Dashain away from my family and loved ones. My Dashain was basically a one on one affair with my sis. And it was not helping that a certain someone was angry with me the whole period of Dashain. It was actually kind of a depressing moment for me. But now i'm glad that it's sunshine after the rain. I made a stupid mistake once and now i won't be making it again. I shall cherish it with all my heart.=) Dashain always brings back fond memories of my past whereby we used to celebrate it with so many relatives and friends. But as i grew up, i realised that the no. of people celebrating it with me always decreased. I hope that when i'm old and have my own family, I will celebrate Dashain with a whole lot of people. This brings on the issue of whether i'll even be able to teach my kids about the Nepalese culture. I'm so scared that after my generation, Nepalese culture will vanish from my family history. I'm learning from kaley and boy can it be difficult at times but so far, i think i'm making vast improvements. At least i want to believe that i'm making improvements. Maybe when i do go back to Nepal this coming Decemeber, i should spend more time at the village and learn more authentic Nepalese. After that, i'll proceed on to learn the gurung language. I must know my own culture so that at least i got sth to teach my children.. haha..

Another thing i've been doing a lot is taking photos of myself.. Camera whoring lor.. I've also been dressing up.. haha.. Women can really be vain sometimes but then trust me when i say when one has nothing to do and the mind starts to wonder, cam whoring and dressing up is really a very good way to de-stress.. haha..